oh my mama. safin never fails to amaze me. what a russian powerhouse.


damn i missed the match cos i was in town looking for jigsaw puzzles. how spasticated rite. yeah so anyway, its distressing and dreadful to be out on sundays. everywhere is filled with fillipino maids, construction workers and oddballs. full stop.
we couldnt take it, so we decided to take shelter at hot shots, our second home. oh my papa, it was swarmed with weird people. and i mean loony, quirky screwballs who stare at your table, even when theres nothing on it. oh and some assholes make it their life amibition to have the balls flying off the table. cannot jump ball properly den dun jump la... act smart. so you'ld see something fly past your face and 2 seconds later hear a loud pah when it lands. and just as you're recovering from the shock, another ball would fly past. so it was like a war zone... cool ah.

travelling up and down is pissing me off. its way way toooo expensive. smart people would take their younger siblings ez link. why didnt mum and dad have another kid. and so after pool, we were too lazy to get our ass down to zouk. flea market. actually we were too kiam la, didnt wanna waste money on transport. plus it was drizzling. wonder how was it.

yeah but nothing could spoil my day, cos i got my paycheck.!!!
this means that hammie gets to upgrade to a 2 story bungalow which costs 80+. shiok ah, got his own exercise equipment, dinning area, spacious bedroom and toilet.
if im happy, i might even get him a wife.

i woke up at 2 cause the stupid plumber came to fix my shower. i was happily dreaming bout that guitarist and he had to spoil it all.
so i got myself out of bed cos my dad thinks its not lady like to be sleeping when the sun has been long up.
i felt like rolling my eyes, but was too lazy. so i went to do a jigsaw puzzle.
den i went grocery shopping with my parents.
my mum happily paid for the drinks without asking anything, cos she thought they were sparkling juice.
i spent a long half hour with the lamp post cos my dad was unhappy with the guard over there and so he complained n blah blah blah.

tat sums up my day.

oh yah i had fun last night. thanx friends. its great that we're finally going to new places, rather than always going to clubs.

ok. gonna feed ham now.

i am fucking pissed. fucking pissed.
i hate it when people scold me for nothing. i didnt even do anything and i got a leave-me-alone sms. fuck you and thank you. i so appreciate it.

i am fuming mad. the weather's not helping. my dad's coming home soon.
what a nice day.

i just got home from our escapade. and i cant wait to tell someone bout it. dot dot dot.
my day started with claire calling me to go shopping. ok.
and then jac's day started when she came to meet us to go little india.
we were like blardy tourists being so suaku and lost in the land of the dark. no dun get me wrong, its really fun. trust me. just that we went on the wrong day, it was fucking crowded.

ok den we went down to clark quay to enjoy the night. the live music over at 1 nite stand was fantabulous. that band was thousand times better den the one over at indochine. plus, the guitarist was cute. our night was cut short when this ang moh guy came over to spoil our mood. fuck him la. singaporeans are not apathetic. and on and on dot dot dot. forget him.

we missed the last train home, had no money and no atm machine, we walked half a mile to chinatown for no particular reason.
i got into a cab with NO money and had to beg for money from my neighbour. somebody reassure me please. there are some cabs with nets machine right? or am i dreaming. and so the cab driver was happy, i was home, i was happy but my mummy wasnt.
but who the fuck cares. we went to little india.!

i am so blardy out of point and i dun know why.
good day.

i got home to find hammie sleeping on my bed.
i quickly reached into his cage and got him out.
he felt warmer than usual and then i got worried.

i am contemplating whether to get him to a vet tmrw morning.
i dun want ham to die. i dun want to go through that pain again.
and so i wonder. am i afraid of losing ham or losing part of MY life.

man, am i selfish.

i wonder if its the pills my dad makes me take everyday, or its just me.
sometimes i say things i dun even remember saying. sometimes i dun even know what im saying. and im not drunk.
and thus i think i have pissed some people off.

daddy wun be in town for the next few days.
hmmm where should i go?
wherever, im just looking forward to taking cabs home.
i think cab drivers r the funniest people on earth.

once, i took a cab from zouk and the cabbie asked if i was from china and how i got to know such a hot spot.
a few days ago, i got a cab from the sleazy part of chinatown, and the cabbie asked me how come im going home so early. haha i knew wat he meant.
ok. do i look like im from china?? damn it.

good nite. im so out of point rite.

i just got home. talking to chua now. she's telling me about the levis store in new york.

i LOVE my job. read L-O-V-E. which job pays you to sit there and stone.
i painted my nails, finished reading Tuesdays With Morris, ate, listened to retro, slept, ate, stoned, ate, packed up, home.
seriously, which job pays for your meals and cab fare.
i encourage those without a job to go get a job with Singapore Mint.


yawn.

ok. mixed feelings.
love-hate relationship. damn it.
damn you. stop playing this stupid game. im not up for it. so spare me.

i picked up the knife from the kitchen n stabbed it into his chest.
i stood there smirking as blood oozed out.
sorry dad, you are just too irritating, unreasonable, overbearing and tiresome. you are pissing me off way too often and i cant take it anymore. you scold me over stupid trivial matters, you hate it when i do things that you werent able to do when you were my age and you watch way too much tv.
who in the fuck would spike my drink when im not looking. no taxi driver would be so dumb to drive me somewhere else n then rape me. no construction worker would hide in the bushes and pounce on me when im walking home. and definitely, NOTHING would disturb me when i get home late.
and because of all that and more, i had to do this. i had to finish you off so that you'll get the hell out of my face. i dun think mummy or sis likes you any more than i do. i used to scold myself for having thoughts of you missing somewhere or your plane crashing, but now i think you deserve it. and so after this day, i'll have peace. for once.



ah fuck this is just another of my wanting-to-kill-daddy fantasy. i thought it really happened. but one thing is real though, i still hate you daddy..

i lost two impt people in a day. in a row. at one shot. just like tat. bitterness, frustration and anger..


i realised that the later i get home, the cheaper the cab fare. i dunno why.


ive been calling ham a he for the past 6 months. but my mum insists that ham is a girl after reading the hamster book i borrowed from the library a few days ago. so i shd change the colour of hams cage to pink.


i was reading URBAN. haha the articles r hilarious.
then my mum came up to me and said "eh you better not fall for a playboy ah."
out of point and unnecessary.


should smoking be banned in clubs?
i have been thinking bout it the whole day after sui mentioned it to me last night.
she said that if smoking WAS banned, she would club more often. but how many people actually dun go clubbing because of the smoke.....?
yeah it'll be healthier for everybody, but a club wun be a club when theres no smoke. the ah beng on the podium wun be THE ah beng if he doesnt smoke n dance at the same time.
if ur a non smoking clubber, i guess you would be happy because it means you only need to wash your hair once and no longer would your hair smell like a chimney after clubbing.
wasnt this in the forum a few months ago? damn i cant remember what was discussed.

finally went shopping today in town.
now i know why they say singapore is an ageing society.
almost everybody on the bus was above 60 yrs old. i was practically the youngest one on board.


Let 'em say we're crazy, I don't care 'bout that
Put your hand in my hand baby, don't ever look back
Let the world around us just fall apart
Baby, we can make it if we're heart to heart

And we can build this dream together, standing strong forever
Nothing's gonna stop us now
And if this world runs out of lovers, we'll still have each other
Nothing's gonna stop us, nothing's gonna stop us now

ha sounds familiar? i cant wait for tmrw. its WEDNESDAY!!!

12 days of work and no rest has taken a toll on me.
sick. cough cough sneeze sneeze.
one week of break before i start the next round.

i've decided to donate 2 bux to every donation box i see. not that im super rich or anything... just trying to help.
i might go do volunteer work when im feeling better.

my sis just bought the U2 ipod. damn it show off. im jealous.

ok so my manager msged me to tell me i could come in late today cos it was raining.
thanx. i was getting ready to go out alrdy! so i went back up and im listening to my jay chou now. lagging huh.

sigh i miss the world. hows working from 10.30 to 9.30 everyday. read. EVERYDAY. i miss my tv. i miss my com. i miss my hammie. i miss home. oh my goodness i actually miss home!
luckily someone has been msging me everyday to keep me alive and smiling.

so claire's working now cos we take turns to go in late. i wonder if we're going mambo tonight. i cant wait to hear my fav hand action song- dancing queen.

oh and one thing, do you believe in reincarnation? Yun Nam hair care does.

hello world..
ive been working my ass off for the past few days.
dead tired.

anyway hello 2005.